Wednesday, August 23, 2006

hemorrhaging money

I've made a couple large purchases in the past couple of days, something I very rarely do. Neither of them were planned.

A few days ago, my computer monitor died on me. It was a 19" flat screen CRT from KDS. I wasn't too upset because I had purchased it with a pretty good rebate a few years ago. I spent around $80 on it. Luckily, I had a 17" that I was able to use as my backup, but after using a 19" flat screen for so long, it quickly became apparent that this wasn't going to cut it for long. I needed something better.

After much debating, I eventually decided to go a little overboard and buy something unnecessarily large. I purchased a Dell LCD 20.1" Ultrasharp Widescreen and it is every bit as beautiful as it sounds and for 20% off the normal price it was easily worth it (it even has Picture-in-Picture, which I find absurd).

Today I purchased a pair of items that were also expensive and won't even last me as long as the monitor. I had decided months ago to go to the Lions' Thanksgiving Day game with my dad and knew that I could get tickets from Ticketmaster when they went on sale today. I should have been able to, but I screwed it up and lost the tickets. Determined to go, I bought a couple of tickets off Stubhub instead (which is a great site because you can get tickets to anything, just expect to pay a little more). The tickets cost more than I had expected since I wasn't able to get them at face value, but instead of sitting in the upper bowl, my dad and I will now be sitting in the lower bowl, row 14, at the back of the endzone. I can't wait.

it's funny...

...because it's true.

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

today's post brought to you by the word "ass"

At work yesterday, my boss had issues with the word "assess" that Tysen had used in a memo. He said it looked like "asses", which it sort of does, but in the context it would be impossible to get the two confused. Of course, he wanted to change it, Tysen wanted it to stay, and I didn't care, but found the conversation endlessly entertaining. So, Tysen and I made a few creative changes to the memo to include as many words beginning with ass we could find. Here is my paragraph:

The assertive assistant assassinated the assay before the assurgent associate could asseverate it. The associate is an assiduous asshole for assigning the assistant to assemble assorted asses and assuage the assumptions of the assault. We must assail the associate with assegais until he assents to assess the associate's assimilation and assure us it is an asset.
You can check out Tysen's paragraph here.

Friday, August 11, 2006

why do you always do this, metro?

I've had some interesting experiences on the Metro recently, and not all of them enjoyable.

Last weekend, Tysen and I went to a party at his friend's house. The party started at 10pm and we left around 8pm because the blue line was undergoing maintenance and would probably take an extra half hour to get where we were going. Even with the work on the trains, leaving at 8pm should have put us at the part a little early. Instead, we didn't arrive at the party until 11pm. Half way between Van Dorn and King Street, our train broke down. We had to wait until they could bring another train to pull our train back to Van Dorn. Then, they put us on a different train to King Street. It took a really long time and I was very anxious to get to this party. Still, we didn't get upset and just relaxed and eventually made it to our destination. On the plus side, our delay allowed us time to strike up a conversation with a guy on the metro named Riley. He was in a marine officer training program and just up visiting his girlfriend in DC. He was interesting to talk to. I hope he made it to his destination.

The following Monday, on our way to work, the entire metro station at Springfield closed down. Apparently, it was out of power. Instead, metro bussed everyone from Springfield to Van Dorn. We waited for quite a while before a woman, who apparently needed to get to work very badly, offered to give us a ride in her car so she could take the HOV (carpool) lane. We weren't even an hour late for work after that. It makes me wonder if it would be worth it to drive in every day.

Then there was the guy who tried to get me to sign up for Amway (or something like it). In case you don't know, Amway is essentially a pyramid scheme. It is possible to make money doing it, but most people don't. He initiated the conversation by "accidentally" bumping into me, then asking me where I worked and other random questions. He seemed like a nice guy, but I was wary since he was talking on the metro, which normal people do not do. I quickly figured out what he was trying to sell me, but I let him talk since listening to him was more interesting than standing on the train trying not to make eye contact with the other passengers. Maybe if I see him again I'll give him pointers on his approach.

The last of my metro stories, but certainly not the least interesting, happened when I was waiting for a train (I think it was at Metro Center). One of the pay phones started ringing and a girl answered it, listened for a second, then hung up saying, "Well that was incredibly inappropriate." The phone started ringing again and the girl's boyfriend picked up the phone, said something I couldn't hear, then hung up. I walked over and asked them what the person had said. Apparently, a very man with a very low, whispery voice said, "I want to suck your pussy." "That was friendly," was the only thing I could think to say. What would posses someone to do such a thing? People amaze me.

In an somewhat unrelated matter, on Wednesday I went on my first date since moving to DC. It was fun. Maybe I'll see her again.